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after Paris it's the last stop, Belgium, Belgium was not in my original plan ... but Mr Change Of Plan alwae has lots of changes up his sleeve, so my frenzs were nt surprised at all ... haiz i liked to change plans so often tt pple kinda blacklisted me liao ... aniwae lots of surprises packed in the last stop ... it has been a long way ... one mth holz in Europe ... 5 mths exchange stint in Sweden ... n it's like a dream ... everyday is a bright new start ... everyday promises something new ... something exciting ... something memorable which you weren't forget ... Sweden was never my first choice ... was never in my choice but it's a funnyove, I couldn't scream, all I could do was think "GET OFF ME, GET OF ME." Then I heard a voice in my head that wasn't my own saying "SPEEEAK". In English!! And then the pressure on my body went away. It was very strange and that time I was really scared.
I talked to my mum about it. Turned out she's been seeing stuff like this for years. Not a lot, but sometimes when she goes on holiday and has to stay in unfamiliar rooms. She also feels hands on her sometimes when there's no one around. She says she thinks it is my grandpa who died when I was about three years old. She told me to go talk to my aunt about it, yes this thing runs in the family.
My aunt used to see people walking on the street that weren't there for others to see. She'd point them out to others and they always thought she was nuts. I told her about the shadow I saw in my room and she said she sees them about three times a week. Sometimes the same ones, sometimes new ones. She said she had seen my grandpa more than once and was waiting for my grandmother to appear soon too. (Grandma died about six months before that.) Hearing this from my aunt was weird. I'd never thought she would be seeing stuff like this. She told me that the best thing to do was to try not to be afraid. Now that was hard to hear. How couldn't I be afraid? I'd never been so scared in my own house. I was singing all day as to prove to this "thing" in my house that I was happy and not afraid. It was weird. I talked to my aunt a lot in that period and she sort of taught me how to deal with it. Once she asked me if this was really the first time I was experiencing this and I started thinking back. I then remembered being thirteen or so and sitting on my bed in my room with my back against the wall, terrified because I could feel something/someone else in the room. I never told anyone about that, but in that period I was scared of being in a room alone. I "overcame" it by saying to myself that I was nuts, that there was nothing there and that I shouldn't act like such a baby. My aunt thinks that I've had this "gift" for a long time but pushed it away because I wasn't ready for it. Could be.
I'm used to weird stuff happening around me sometimes now and I even joke about it. Sometimes it makes me feel protected, so to speak, as if someone is watching my back. I was in my friend's basement once and while I was standing there I felt that something pushing me back. First I thought the floor was slanting, but it looked OK. When I started walking backwards, out of the basement, the pushing feeling went away. I thought "fine, if something doesn't want me in here I'll go wait outside." Nothing happened to the basement later, I mean, it didn't collapse or anything.
It's been a few months since I've seen or felt anything now and strangely enough I kind of miss it. I've never played with an Ouija board or conjured up spirits or something. I thought about getting an Ouija board but the thought of that scares me a little because I'm familiar with stories of things going terribly wrong and I don't want to call something bad on me. So I don't think I'll ever get one. I'll just wait and see if anything "scary" happens to me again sometime soon.

If I freaked you out or you think I'm weird and scary now then so be it. Believe it or not, this is a part of me. I wasn't sure if I should post about this, but I just did, didn't I.
If you want to comment on this but don't want the whole world to know what you have to say then my email is in my sidebar. Gosh, now I sound like one of those help organizations at the end of true story movies. Sorry about that.
Oh, and there goes my rule about not blogging between 10 am and 9 pm. It's just that this story took a while to type.
is but don't want the whole world to know what you have to say then my email is in my sidebar. Gosh, now I sound like one of those help organizations at the end of true story movies. Sorry about that.
Oh, and there goes my rule about not blogging between 10 am and 9 pm. It's just that this story took a while to type.
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