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Yuan Song, Sin Wah, Chun Kiat  back to top?

yuan song, Sin Wah, Chun Kiat  back to top?

Me with CK ... Sentosa  back to top?

CK + Yuansong (YS)   back to top?

Me ... before ... Sentosa... eating the same as CK  back to top?

Chunkiat (CK)   back to top?

Nephew nautilus + mum  back to top?

Nephew nautilus + mum ... cute rite  back to top?

Yesterday ... Today ... Tomorrow

"The canterville ghost"is the best story written by Oscar Wilde ... it was intended for his children ... the magic of his writing lie in that there is beauty in every sentence ... it is not only intended for reading ... but to read aloud ... becuz u could feel the emotions, the sadness as you read it, that is i supposed the magic of his works ... no writer has captivated my attention as much as him ...

here it goes ... "you must weep for me for my sins, because i have no tears, and pray with me for my soul, because I have no faith, and then, if you have always been sweet, and good, and gentle, the Angel of Death will have mercy on me ... for against the purity of a little child the powers of Hell cannot prevail"

woke up this morning ... n felt a sense of sadness swept pass me ... I always look forward to BIG holiday ... but when it's over ... it fills me with a sense of sadness during early morning ... Christmas has been REWARDING ... haha ... got a couple of gifts ... n they are nice gift ... no WHITE ELEPHANT this time ... so naturally I''m smiling ... I got a frog from CK + SW ... kinda cute because they saw me take a pic of a tissue cover with a frog on it ... I think frog r cute ... but honestly I couldn't touch it ... it's too slimy for my liking

with the Christmas over ... there oni a few days of 2004 left ... I tink I muz be smiling tt 2004 is over ... 2004 has been a turbulent year ... I have my share of happiness + sorrow ... such extreme of emotions made 2004 hard to define ... experiences wise ... nothing beat 2004 ... after all it's the year where I travelled Europe ... met lotsa friends ... n made some good friends ... tt wat matter rite ... I may never see the northern light again ...but tis year 2004 ... I will remember

I will remember the days of February ... a shooting star raced across the sky ... when I'm in the middle of nowhere ... feeling cold with a punctured tyre ... called it magic ... I found my way after the shooting star flashed across the sky ... 2004 was a busy year ... busy adapting ... busy travelling ... busy partying ... n I never studied so much during my NUS life

second half of the year ... was a bit painful ... i returned to Singapore confronted with things I left behind ... what I need to do is obvious ... to cast away certain things from my thought ... it has been a long time ... but I have learnt to move on ... slowly but surely ... 5 painful months is the process ...

i wan to remember tis year in a positive light ... at least for 2004 I finished up all the things I started in 2003 ... be it preparing for my student exchange or launching my website etc so it's a pleasing thing ... becuz I'm slowly heading to the direction of delivering what I said which is important ... I don wan to be a NATO (No Action Talk Only ) ... haha

tdy I went shopping for stationary & den I cleared up my room ... so things r looking a bit more tidy ... but it's still nt gud enough ... tmr gonna go MUJI n get a filing cabinet ... too much papers made me really mad ... i donno whether I will be getting a room in NUS ... actually I don really relish staying in NUS ... cuz the room is too small... n i don have my own toilet ... after all when I'm pampered this much in Sweden ... it's difficult to downgrade ... plus i tink I will miss the warmth of home ... at least at home I can hug, squeeze my cousin or my nephew ... but travelling to n frm sch sux ... n NUS is closer to orchard ... so there is gud n bad ... all in all I looking forward to my last semester in NUS ... i'm sure it will end in a bright note ...
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2004 has been an odd year ...

yes ... it has been an odd year, 2004 is a "happening" year, somehow I felt that there were a lot of things I have to confront with, so this is really a hard year to characterise ... there were moments when I were really estastic ... n there were moments when I cursed my luck ... there wree times when I wondered why things happened to me

the horoscope wrote that I may not have a good year ... in way it is right ... but then 2005 will be better I'm certain of that because these few years my luck hasn't been that bad

I guessed that the problems with me ... I believed in myself too much ... that sometimes I never see a crisis coming ... I have so much faith, that my confidence gets the better of me ... I like challenges, i like to rise to the occasions because everytime I always thought that I won't yield to the obstacles, but when I failed, I felt so dumbfounded ... because I never thought I could, my cousin said I have too much confidence, sometime it works to my disadvantage ... I think he's right

Sat nite 18 Dec was cousins'' gathering day ... planned to go to wild wild wet ... but it family day for an organisation ... so the place was packed ... so we shelved the plan n met for dinner + karaoke after ... went to have vietnam food ... weina injured her legs ... so she was limping all the way ... reminds me of the time when I have to limp ... during my BMT days n after my marathon this year ... after my BMT, I thought I was never going to run long distance anymore ... because my legs really hurt if i train for long distance ... maybe I never give up the belief that I will be run eventually again ... completing the marathon in June gave me a sense of accomplishment ... something which I felt too often, a feeling which I was never too tired of. have a great time singing karaoke ... cousin weina can really sing, she said she sings alot, her frenzs are quite crazy about karaoke ... wanted to extend the time cuz we didn't feel we have sung enough ... but the place was crowded n so we couldn't extend ... we will sing again on Jan 9 though

Sun was tuition day as usual ... met up with sy + ch for gym ... finally got to go gym ... felt bad abt neglecting my fitness ... but life has been bz ... not much time for leisure ... don even has much time for shopping ... i wonder wat's wrong with my schedule

Christmas week was wat everyone was waiting for ... din do my shopping until thursday n friday morning ... but the last minute king did ok ... the gifts were up to my requirement ... met kian leng for movie on Tuesday nite ... watched Director Hong movie "Woman is the future of man" - my frenzs have been avid korean movie fans this year ... so they asked me abt this movie ... Director Hong movie is unique in its own sense ... it's portrayal is v spot-on ... but watching his movie is a sobering experience ... leaving u pessimistic ... but u can't fault him because the depiction is so true ... watching Director Hong's movie always left me wondering about the difficulty of human relationships ... it is not a film for everyone ... but I think he must be ranked as one of the best korean directors korea has produced in recent times, i have not doubts about this ... wanted to complete a puzzle with kian leng ... but have problems finding time to complete it ... honours year is so tough becuz of the competition ... tinking abt it just made me sick

went sentosa on thursday with CK, YS, SW ... the sun came up late ... so we only get a bit of the sun ... still felt tt sentosa is overrated ... becuz the sands are not fine ... they r really nt nice to step on ... but tt the bez we have in Singapore ... have a fun time juz lazing ard in the sun

Christmas eve ... was spent at Jayce's plc ... haven met his gf for a long time since the Europe trip ... so it was great meeting his gf n all her close pals ... Jayce taught me how to play mahjong, so it wasn't as complicated as I thought it was ... it was rather fun ... n we were winners by early morning ... we have gift exchange ... n I got a Royce's choc ... they said the choc is realli nice but i left the choc at Jayce''s plc ... so still couldn't taste it now ... looking forward to the new year countdown bbq ... it shd b fun

end of part 1 ...


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Moments

this has been a great wk ... so far ... went canoeing tdy with Chunkiat & pals ... they are among my closest gp of frenzs ... so I was extremely happy tdy to meet up with den again ... becuz I have not met up with Chunkiat for a long time ... at one time I was so worried tt our friendship will realli disappear ... got a CD frm him ... cuz he know tt my laptop has crashed ... so he burnt for me a whopping 180 songs ... haven finished the whole CD but so far the coolest song will b Dragoste din tei by Ozone ... donno wat language is it those ... can't even guess ... but it doesn't matter realli ... sinwah has a craving for Katong Laksa ... so we went there after canoeing ... v v full indeed ... I liked the way my frenzs enjoy eating their food ... it's a nice feeling watching pple eating n enjoying their food

went to Ck's house after tt ... he asked me to help him style his hair ... but din do quite a gd job ... hopefully nxt time will b beta

even if earli week there was just one incident that was one blemish ... tdy just made up for it ... nxt wk we r gg to Sentosa ... so it another GREAT day at the beach ... looking forward to it

tmr gonna wake up earli to do my planning for the research proj ... Prof Urs wan to see my planning ... he's one of the most charismatic prof at least in sci fac ... so I don wan to disappoint him ... but success of a research proj depends on time, excellent planning & of cuz luck ... time is not on my side ... it never was ... never will b ... but hopefully my planning will make up for it

if life is a moment by moment experience ... mabbe it could be nice to relive 2004 again thru all those moments ...

Saddest Month: February
Saddest Day: February 16 - nothing went right, but it really was the lowest point of the year ... after this everything went right
Happiest Month: April
Gloriest Moment: Finally finishing my website ... still lotsa unfinished work though
Magical moments: Watching the northern light, finally "smelling" Highbury, visiting Oscar Wilde graveyard
Most Magical moments: Seeing Vincent Van gogh - Starry Night in Berlin, Germany ... no painting made me feel as emotional as this one, i almost cried
Sweetest moments: having so much people to see me off to Sweden, playing bendy & drinking whiskey with Swedish frenz, Patrick.

there are still many moments all packed within the tiny ivory cells of my brain, it takes time to recall ... but 2004 is an ambivalent year for me ... i nvr have so many contrasting moments in my life ... mabbe it those sad moments tt made me more human after all



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Arsenal vs Chelski

was home earli on a Sunday nite ... can't seem to do much stuff ... preoccupied with organising outing n stuff ... preoccupied with the match tonite ... I have nvr been tis distracted

Arsenal vs Chelski is the biggest match in 2004 ... if Arsenal wins ... they will be handed a big morale booster ... something can be as upbeating as winning tis match ... n nothing can be as upbeating for us Gooners...

but reality is disturbing ... Chelski is on a high ... they are the form team ... Arsenal's confidence has dipped ... they still feel sorry for themselves ... they are still shell-shocked tt they have lost to Man Utd ... but all gud things have to end somehow ... 49 matches unbeaten is a record ... a tremendous record ... that is unlikely to be repeated again

i have never write blog on consecutive days ... but now I'm too preoccupied to do anything ... i wished i could force myself not to watch this match ... but clearly i couldn't restrain myself ... it's really hard + tough

tis week gg to be THE week ... i'm looking forward to it ... lotsa water activities ... so it's gonna be fun ... i have this love affair with water ... used to be in the bathroom for a good 45 minutes just because I love the feeling of water flowing down me ... it's v relaxing, rejuvinating ... juz the perfect tonic one need ... can't wait to go canoeing with Yuan Song & pals ... we have mentioned this before ... but guess everyone is so bz to organise it ... finally we are gg on Thursday


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Learning, playing, dreaming, hoping and smelling ....

this has been a weird holiday ... started my honours yr project on Wed ... seemed a bit like a premature ending to my holiday ... so FAST !!! but reality is usually not as crude as our imagination

Dick told me Saw is a must watch ... so I went to watch Saw with Kian Leng on Monday ... it's quite psychotic n I guessed a sense of madness enveloped me when I was watching it ... it was quite a movie ... heavy stuff. hav lunch with Rachel earlier at crepes n cream ... saw a realli nice puzzle at Jigsaw puzzle house ... so I'm thinking of buying n completing it ... during the holiday ... but the holiday aren't exactly as long ... so I hope there is time for this ... because I have so much plans ... but everything is either not started or stucked somewhere.

Monday passed by v quickly ... n I couldn't remember what I do on Tuesday ... I think I was at home playing with my nephew, Nautilus ... he is a smart boy ... only 11 months old ... but it's darn smart ... mom said I wasn't tt smart when I was a child ... but I like to count $$$ and I couldn't write when I was in kindergarten ... I couldn't understand at that time y I have to write ... n y mum was so distressed that i couldn't write

in a way I was looking forward to wed ... even if that signals an end to my holiday ... went to Prof bolsteri office at 9am ... was a bit late ... I always was ... den we talked for a while ... Prof urs is quite a charismatic prof n he got a naturing character ... so working under him kinda inspired me , but it's a new area ... so the failure rate is higher ... but den I don't think about failure when I embarked on something ... I guessed I like new challenges, it what that kept me alife ... vincent , michie and audrey are all patient, crazy and fun pple to be with ... so working under the same lab with them kinda rock ... so it isn't tt dreadful waking up in the morning n traveling to sch ... n living in Yishun is no fun ... becuz it too far away frm NUS ... but still I realli like Yishun ... because it's a nice, quiet place

so week 2 of my holiday is basically abt starting on my research project ... as Christmas arrives I will take more time off to enjoy ... it's one of those holiday I looks forward to ... New Year Day is more important to me than CNY ... I like the busy shopping centres, the crowded Orchard street, the sight of people buying and wrapping presents for each other ... it's quite a warm feeling ... n it doesn't happen throughout the year ... so it's special

the remnants of this semester still lives on ... I still dream of setting for exam ... guess the results doesn't really matter that much to me before, but this semester I have resolved to work hard ... so I want to see my efforts being paid off

of late ... i have enjoyed the smell of baby ... so I like to sniff at my baby nephew when he is asleep ... feel really much like a dog ... wondering why does baby smell so gud??? n they r so cute ... tt u just want to hug them

nxt wk is the second last week of 2004, a bit happy becuz ... 2005 will b a even better year ... gg by the horoscope which predicts that 2004 is a bad year for me ... so if 2004 is ok for me ... of cuz logically 2005 will b better. anyway horoscope is really nt v accurate ... maybe we believe them because we badly need something for us to hold onto, to believe in when the world around us is ever-changing ... perhaps it made us feel a bit more secure



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What I want for Christmas is you ...

Christmas is oni 3 weeks away ... now I'm already counting down the days to Christmas and of course New Year ... New Year is always great , I think for me it's more meaningful than CNY, after all we use the English calendar everyday but so much the Chinese calendar rite? donno which countdown party to go though, still surveying my options. As for Christmas, most prob will b at Jayce's plc ... used to countdown for Christmas at East Coast Park, this yr will b different for a change ... den will watch Arsenal game on Boxing Day

have all this fun sorted up, tt's y i'm reluctant to go Shanghai, mum asked me to accompany her, but den guess I have travelled too much this first half of the yr ... tt I rather stay in Singapore during the Christmas season. have to do some shopping as well ... but rite now still haven has much inspiration on wat to buy.

Taufik won the Singapore Idol, I thought he was the deserving winner, humble, talented, charismatic and the most improved finalists. He sang v well for the finale ... especially his third song, Mrs Jones, was so mesmerising, was talking to Joslyn + Wei Lin abt the Singapore Idol for a good 45 mins or so

it has been like 1 wk since the exam finishes ... finally ... santosh says I have shedded 10 kgs ... haha ... he muz be joking ... I don have so much wt to lose anyway ... but I tink I really have shrinked ... was giving tuition yst ... n they have this large gigantic mirror in front of me ... I looked realli small in the mirror ... so I decided tt tdy I will eat more rather than having my friends "complaining" that I don't eat that much. Right after exam, went to Raofeng's place to burn away the stupid immuno notes, never again do I need to study immunology again, we only managed to burn a few sets, then his room become become so smoky that Guobao was choking ... it was quite funny, a bit strange like playing fire in the toilet when I was small ... I just like playing fire as a small kid, me and cousin, noi, will lock ourselves in the toilet and we will burn stuff on top of th toilet bowl... but we were always discovered ... everytime I have to "smoke" myself out of crisis.

saw Bridget Jone with noi + fam just after the "burning" session, felt like a smoker because the smoke left an irritating, lingering smell around me ... Bridget Jone was nice, fun and lighthearted for a change ... never watched the first episode though but it was nice nonetheless ... haven meet fam for a long time, she has permed her hair looked quite different ... n she treated me to dinner

nxt day was sun-tanning ... lie down on the bench throughout the late morning sun ... with Jayce ... tink both of us got sunburnt ... the sun was just too powerful ... I never really thought December sun can be so "damaging" ... my skin was basically peeling out from my face, and my chest region is really itchy, but aloe vera realli helps ... tks gudness there is aloe vera ... everyone talks about my scorched face the next few days ... but the peeling is almost completed

stella has returned frm her HK trip ... bought me an Arsenal socks ... I'm starting to have more Arsenal stuff ... Arsenal is going thru a bad patch ... I used to get really painfully upset when they lost ... actualli no one can understand y I get so upset, I don't get agitated that easily ... but now I guess I have toned down a bit ... I guess i need to, how can I possibly have a life ... if I always get so upset when Arsenal lost right?

laptop crashes on wednesday ... the specialist says my hard disk is spoilt ... everything inside will be gone ... so I lost all my lecture slides, precious pictures and the diary I kept in my laptop. The diary was special ... containing my quieter moments, haunting thoughts ... it is an unusual diary ... and for 2 years it has been an outlet ... perhaps now with the erasure of it ... I might finally be able to move on ...


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